Friday, June 18, 2010

1 1/2 years later...

hello, my neglected blog. hello, nonexistent readers.
i'm back :)

i feel like i have to explain a lot about myself... but like inigo montoya of 'princess bride', no, let me sum it up.
- i got a job! yey!
- i am now renting a unit by myself! (well, the sis came with me)
- i have my own car!
- i got into a car accident (hence the new car) -- came out almost unscathed (thank God!)

anyway, today is the 2nd day of a much needed 5-day break from work. like all vacations, it will go by fast, but i would like to think i am taking advantage of it as much as i can (though writing in a blog suggests otherwise -- this girl's got nothing to do!). and so it happened, that during my free time, i revisited this blog. thought about revamping it, or even just dropping it and starting a new one.

ugh. it feels daunting just thinking about it.
and i feel it won't solve anything of what i feel at the moment.

despite some things falling in place (as i hoped they would), i still feel there are parts of my life is still missing. perhaps i miss writing. or reading for leisure. or going to church (admittedly, not the regular going type). i feel a sort of detachment from everything, regressing to a state where i'm back to merely observing than participating.

perhaps this is all part of a normal cycle when the human body finds itself repositioned in a new environment with a new set of routines. i'm used to it -- given that my family has moved several times during my early childhood -- but i think it somehows explains the detachment that i feel. somehow, i'm conscious of the fact that things do not remain permanent, except for change.

what i hope to do is give myself some direction as to what i want or where i want to head off. this line of thought really came from a book i just picked up at a local thrift store, which suggests having some goal in mind, to not be drowned by the daily routines that i tend to always rush in doing, work or no-work.

thus, i've decided to simply pick up where i left this blog at. a new blog is always nice to have, like a fresh start, but i guess... i guess i need to remember this. and many others. because as it will turn out, a new blog also has possibility of having the same posts like this one i'm writing now, right? so i say, let MY history stand. let me see where i came from, to know where i can go to.

0 comments // 11:48 PM